As an aspiring freelancer, I subscribe to a plethora of magazines. I love seeing them in the mailbox, so smooth and shiny, begging me to read them. I look forward to sitting down with a mug of coffee, feet propped up on the coffee table, dog’s head in my lap while I read it cover to cover on my leather sofa, a nice fire keeping me toasty. Then I remember I don’t have that life, so I peruse the headlines and skim one or two pages before I set it in the pile of Things I’ll Read One Day.
Oh, so many things to do One Day. One Day I’ll start scrap booking again, One Day I’ll clean the basement, One Day I’ll pick up that unfinished novel and come up with an ending. And One Day, I will sit with a mug of coffee, feet propped up, and read a magazine cover to cover.
Really, though, I’m not looking to read the magazines to change my life. It’s very rare to read an article about adding spice to my marriage and not roll my eyes at the same time. And a tip I read about in a health magazine suggested I wear something that feels good against my skin. Really? Is this something some women have to be told? I’ve got a good size group of girlfriends, and we pretty much always wear sweats-yoga pants if we’re feeling sassy, and jeans if we’re going to be in mixed company. Do other women not do this?
My husband reads two magazines-People (how else will he know the hijinks Lindsay Lohan is up to?) and Consumer Reports. If I want to ‘connect’ to my husband, as advised by every women’s magazine ever, all I have to do is say something like, “So, did you see the coffee maker you chose is rated number one in Consumer Reports? Good pick, honey!” and voila! He lights up like the sky on the 4th of July.
My kids love to get their magazines as well. Hey-if you need a gift idea-there you go. You can thank me via email. Now, if I can just get them to sit on the sofa, a mug of chocolate milk, to read those thing in one sitting, cover to cover, my One Day might get here a little sooner, stinky dog and all.