Life and Times of a Modern Housewife: Dec. 3, 2012

Julia Garstecki-Derkovitz
Julia Garstecki-Derkovitz

Dear Santa,

How are things up in the North Pole? Are you almost ready for the big day?

I’m writing to clear up some things that you read in Drew and Steph’s letters that you received last week, as well as to make a few personal requests of my own.

Drew mentioned he’s been helping me around the house, cleaning up after himself and doing what he’s told to do right away. And I see Stephanie promises she’s kept her room clean. They failed to mention, however, the amount of nagging, whining, and declarations of unfairness that preceded said ‘cleaning’. I’m curious, do you consider the preceding behavior and put that on the ‘naughty’ side, or do you just look on the bright side and call it a win for the good side because their chore was somewhat accomplished?

They both wrote letting you know what a great sibling they’ve been. This is also questionable. While watching them play outside in the first snow I’m sure you noticed them laughing and rolling around making angels. Did you happen to catch them hitting each other and pushing each other off of the swings? While these behaviors are definitely naughty, I have to say neither of them tattled, and I think that was pretty nice.

There is also the issue of their requests. In all three of her letters, I noticed Steph requested Pixie Dust for her and our dog. She would like for both of them to fly. I’m thinking maybe you shouldn’t grant this wish. I’m not sure I want to be driving all over the country trying to get her home for supper. She’s also asked for more Barbies. F.Y.I. she doesn’t play with the ones she already has, so let’s just skip those items this year.

I noticed Drew didn’t request anything, he just sent you a list of questions to answer. This is not surprising, because he prefers conversation to toys. Perhaps you could make a robot that looked like me that could give him undivided attention? …that liked to rehash various sporting statistics?…that would be awesome for both of us!

Finally, thanks for sending the elves here to make that Olive Garden. I officially have it all!

Best wishes,